Ok, I know this is a bit of an advert. Sorry okes, but I gotta do it.

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Doors

Myself and two mates were heading home after seeing a gig in Muizenburg. One of the guys in the car had been on the front page of the newspaper that same day and had been on the radio a couple of days before. We were all joking that it was his chance to make it big now that he's been in the media so frequently. We started making up metaphors (and repeating old ones) for getting your break, catching the elevator going up, getting your foot in the door, getting your hand in the panties, through the threshold, you get the point. But. While we were carrying on like that, my mate, the subject of this playful ridicule and whom was driving, I notice he was looking at his door more than the road. Like really inspecting it. Shaking it.

I asked, "What you doing?" pointing to his door.
He says, "You said my door was open"

If your brain implodes and you don't hear it, does it really implode?

Last night I felt like a huge tit. One of those ugly ones where the nipple covers most of the tit, you know?
Like that.

I went with a mate to The Assembly in town for Cokey Falkow's "farewell party" and after sitting around for about 30 minutes my mate turns to me and say's "I don't think anything is happening here tonight"
I said "Ag man, just chill, it's on." We bet 50 zar.

Ten minutes late we jolling some foosball and two okes ask us if they can play doubles with us. Turns out the one guy was the manager and he told us it was Cokey's farewell party but he wasn't gettting on stage for a show.

Felt like a douche.

He's on tonight (Wednesday) at La Med for his last show before heading to LA to try his hand at some acting. Good luck!

Mozzies! Arghh!

What is the the point of mosquitoes?

It's a question as old as time itself but it has yet to be answered adequately. The best answer I've found is "they prevent overpopulation". As harsh (and funny) as that answer is, it doesn't really give a full answer. That's because not all mozzies are murdering little fuckers.

What about those mozzies that populate non-malaria areas? What's the point of them?

I reckon what has happened is that these sadistic half-gram buggers are the losers of the species and they know it. I mean, if all your cousins up north have this cool power to yield over humans and you have nothing you'd be pretty pissed off. So, to get their own back and show their cousins they're also cool they fly around your ear just as you're happily dozing off and cause you to slap yourself with rage while they flit off in that irritatingly smooth way to perch on the ceiling just out of your reach.

They then sit there and spit your own blood back at you as all you can do is try stare the thing to death while trying very hard not to have a heart attack.

On second thoughts, maybe "they prevent overpopulation" is a good answer after all.

gecko landscape

A landscape for a pet gecko in a glass tank but mounted on the wall. The effect being that with the gecko on the wall you will look at him and his landscape from above. A birds eye view.

Imagine

Imagine being a huge bird with sweeping wings and soaring majestically, low over a lake. Imagine how free you would feel!!!